This story has made its way around the world the past few weeks, with many
people believing it was actually true. Lots of people said they didn't even care
if the story was true or not, but that it deserves to be true, just because
they found it so funny, even though a woman ended up dying in the story.
A "dark comedy" or "black satire" is what some people have called it,
while admitting they laughed at it nonetheless.
When I first wrote the story, I didn't think it was really anything
special, but it seems to have struck a chord with many people who ended
up passing it around to lots of other people, sometimes changing the EAP
to AP or some other news source to make it look more authentic or to give
it more credibility somehow.
What's interesting or funny is that this story was intended to make a mockery
of the ridiculous idea, as I see it, of some rapture, where people
will supposedly float up into the sky to meet Jesus in the air. How can anybody
in their right mind actually believe such an absurd idea?
"You're just not in Tune with the Truth of the Holy Spirit," is what
many religious people have told me when I make fun of the Rapture story
or idea.
It was actually a bumper sticker which led to me writing the "Mistaken Rapture"
story. I was stuck in traffic behind a guy in a pickup truck one day, and noticed
the bumper sticker on his truck, and also some balloons in the area somewhere.
Whether the balloons were in the back of his truck or not, I can't remember for
sure, but I can remember thinking to myself "Who could actually be so brainwashed
as to believe in some god who will lift people out of their cars, through their
roofs, and leave the cars out of control, liable to smash into other
cars and perhaps even kill some people who might be walking alongside
the road or driving behind the person with the bumper sticker?"
I wonder if any rapture-believing airline pilots or bus drivers or taxi drivers
would have the nerve to put such a sticker on the back of their plane or bus or
taxi, if they were allowed to, just so they could warn the passengers what
they might be getting themselves into, should Jesus come back during their
ride on the plane or bus or taxi?
The original story posted to Usenet on August 2, 2001:
Arkansas Woman Killed in Mistaken Rapture
by Elroy Willis -- August 2, 2001
ARKANSAS CITY (EAP)
-- A Little Rock woman was killed yesterday after leaping through
her moving car's sunroof during an incident best described as a
"mistaken rapture" by dozens of eye-witnesses.
Thirteen other people were injured after a twenty-car pile-up
resulted from people trying to avoid hitting the woman, who was
apparently convinced that the rapture was occurring when she saw
twelve people floating up into the air, and then passed a man
on the side of the road who she believed was Jesus.
"She started screaming `He's back! He's back!' and climbed
out through the sunroof and jumped off the roof of the car," said
Everet Williams, husband of 28-year-old Georgann Williams who
was pronounced dead at the scene.
"I was slowing down but she wouldn't wait till I stopped,"
Williams said. "She thought the rapture was happening and was
convinced that Jesus was gonna lift her up into the sky,"
he went on to say.
"This is the strangest thing I've seen since I've been on the
force," said Paul Madison, first officer on the scene.
Madison questioned the man who looked like Jesus and discovered
that he was on his way to a toga costume party, when the tarp
covering the bed of his pickup truck came loose and released
twelve blow-up sex dolls filled with helium, which then floated
up into the sky.
Ernie Jenkins, 32, of Fort Smith, who's been told by several of his
friends that he looks like Jesus, pulled over and lifted his arms into
the air in frustration and said "Come back," just as the Williams' car
passed him, and Mrs. Williams was sure that it was Jesus lifting people
up into heaven as they drove by him.
"I think my wife loved Jesus more than she loved me," the widower
said when asked why his wife would do such a thing.
When asked for comments about the twelve sex dolls, Jenkins replied
"This is all just too weird for me. I never expected anything like
this to happen."
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Links to the story
Below are some comments from different people around Usenet and
the internet who voiced their opinion about the story.
Jerri (jerlapoint@earthlink.net)
I don't know if this happened or not. I don't even care whether it happened
or not. I'm just awfully glad someone wrote the story, 'cause it certainly
gave me a laugh.
Tony von Krag (vonkrag@yahoo.com)
ROFLMAO. This was too much, I'm sitting here bloated w/ pounds of
wonderful fries (no mayo involved) when this came along and I started
laughing! Please warn when sending out something as wacky and weird so
I can be properly in awe of the wonders of civilization.
Kip Williams (kipw@home.com)
At least they didn't put in that he also happened to have holes in
his hands and feet, due to "a recent nail-gun accident."
Denise (luvtheboss@aol.com)
OMG!
This has to take the prize for the year.
And I'm going to remember this story the next time somebody says "if it walks
like a duck, it must be a duck" yada yada.
angelagrace (cryinthesun@junoAndIKnow.com)
Hey, somebody mailed it to me and it was just too good not to pass along, hoax
or not.
Denise (luvtheboss@aol.com)
Geez, too bad if it wasn't true, it was funny. Whether you are "antireligious"
or not. Sorta like, whether you're anti potato or not, huh?
Debbie the Gruesome (das@spamcop.net)
Okay, so it's a verified urban legend, but I saw it today for the
first time (someone unaware of its status posted it to an internal
newsgroup at work and was quickly set straight) and I had to share:
It's Just Me! (jlgibbs@magicnet.net)
This is HILARIOUS .. and one I haven't seen yet. How long has this one
been around?
John E. Smith (ajswebmaster@ajs-trucking.net)
Ames, IS THIS FOR REAL???????? LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Joseph (futrfysician@cfl.rr.com)
This was hysterical. Darwin winner if ever there was one. IMO, she was a
good subject for Paxil or other psychotropics.
SimplySue@webtv.net
What a tall tale.:-)) Someone had a great imagination.
JP George (jpgeorge@mindspring.com)
Below is an actual story culled from the Dow Jones news service (29
Aug, 2001). I'm interested in feedback on it, specifically how it
relates to Sufi studies.
Mr Slot (mr_slotMUNGED@optusnet.com.au)
Hi All
A friend sent this to me in an email. Don't know if it's a true story
or not, but it's too good to just pass up so here it is.
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