Mount Rushmore Attacked By Christian Fundamentalists

KEYSTONE SOUTH DAKOTA (EAP) -- A group of Christian fundamentalists who think the Taliban set a good example by destroying figures of Buddha carved in rock walls in Afghanistan was stopped yesterday after one member of the group was arrested while trying to plant dynamite in the nose of Abraham Lincoln on Mount Rushmore.

They call themselves "Soldiers For Christ," and say that Mount Rushmore is nothing more than a mountain of idols and ancestor worship, and claim that God himself spoke to their leader, who told them to destroy the rock faces.

"The only face that should be seen there is the face of Jesus," said Bob Roberts, 45, of Santa Clara California, who claims to have a personal relationship with Jesus and God Himself.